One of the hardest things that I’ve learned over the last ten years while trying to get (but really, stay) sober, is the ability to let go. Sometimes this means letting go of control over how other people drive, sometimes this means letting go of people and relationships that I may not yet be ready…
Read More >>The most common thing that I get asked is how do I answer the question, “are they a boy or a girl?!” As a parent practicing gender creative parenting, this is how that usually goes. But, I want to preface by saying that Wilder is being raised during a pandemic, is unable to get vaccinated…
Read More >>I want to spend some time talking about hormones, Testosterone, and going off of meds without first speaking with your prescribing doctor, which, my friends, we shouldn’t do. Let’s talk about why so that you don’t do, what I did. I often get asked if I have started back up on Testosterone since having Wilder…
Read More >>Now, as we wrap up viewing one of the greatest moments of my life, I need to warn you. The ending, is bloody and graphic. I’m including pictures of getting my sutures because I hope to normalize it. Getting my yaya sutured up at home in my own bed was a bit uncomfortable, but I’ve…
Read More >>The Moment we met. Wilder Lea was born at 8:20am at home in the water after ten hours of labor. Wilder took their first breath on my chest, many moments after being born and having their airways cleared. It was love at first breath, for all of us.
Read More >>Part 1: The Labour I’ll be going into full detail in my book, but I labored for ten hours at home with Wilder. Seven of those hours were spent in my bathtub in the pitch black of the night, while three were spent in a pool as we welcomed the sunrise on a November Saturday…
Read More >>It’s been a month since spending eighteen hours driving around Portland in search of the best bridge to jump off of. It’s been a month since I stood on the Ross bride for hours, making sure I had everything lined up for Wilder before jumping. I had to make sure they had enough milk without…
Read More >>What do you do when what you want is vastly different than what you need? Or when what you need to do brings you much needed relief, but also with it, pain and grief? I want to take a moment to talk about what I’d do, while it’s weighing heavy on my heart. You see,…
Read More >>Ok, a lot of you probably noticed that I didn’t share Wilder’s birth story on my blog yet, like I had planned. It’s mostly ready to go, it’s my heart that isn’t. I thought that I too was ready, but when I sat down to publish it here I heard my grandmother yell, “STOP!” And…
Read More >>Now, let’s talk about the healing process. My main goal in sharing this is to help lessen fear, not increase it. But before we do, I don’t want to sugar coat things. Yes, my baby quite literally split my yaya right open when I shot them through the burning ring of fire, and even…
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